New Book of Revelations Found
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It has been many years since the Dead Sea scrolls were found in the desert surrounding the Dead Sea. However, archeologists, working with Heraldo Rivera, a Foxx reporter, have uncovered what they believe to be a new Book of Revelations.
Found in a drawer in a house in Galilee under some old Playboys, the book is dated 36 AD suggesting that it was written by one of the apostles. The initial news reports that it was written by Judas Iscariot are probably wrong as he is known to have been writing his own gospel at the time.
The most striking feature of the new book is an explanation for 
lingerie worn at night by women in the first century. The pictures are remarkably well preserved and suggest that Playboy magazines may have a use other than reading the articles. The new Book explains for example, the hidden meaning of a T-shirt as well as the meaning of a bustier. Below are some of the translations, as provided to Foxx in an exclusive story, by Father Guido Sarducci, Jr.
Lanz cotton night gown = no way Jose (notice the hands on hips). Probability = 0% Temperature in Hell = -276 F.
One of your new cotton T-shirts = Only if you're Don Juan or Brad Pitt. Probability = 5% Temperature in Hell = 31 F
Spaghetti strap spandex top with built in sport bra and white cotton shorts = Are you kidding? Is she going to the gym or bed? Probability = not bad if she's had a few Margaritas, 35% Temperature in Hell = 55 F.
Nylon Bustier with matching leather panties worn by the material girl herself = Very good especially if your into 'light' S&M Probability = 75% Temperature in Hell = 100 F
None, passed out drunk on the bed = Hmm... this is a real moral dilemma . Probably faced by most men in history. Still unsolved problem with lots of 'gray areas' and no guidance from Father Sarducci, Jr. Moral compass pointing far North. Probability = depends on whether she will remember and/or respect you in the morning. If no then = 100% Temperature in Hell = For you buddy, you're going straight to hell for even considering this. 212 F.
Additional sections from the Book of Revelations were found and will be shared as the pages are unstuck and translations from the good Father Sarducci, Jr. become available to FOXX.
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